A memoir by bestselling author
LaJoyce Brookshire
Even though this story is old I decided to share it, maybe it will encourage some of us to take the decisions we make more seriously.
Be a STAR: Stop Think and Reconsider your decisions........
LaJoyce Brookshire was married to a man she thought was her very own Prince Charming…but then discovered a veiled side of him…He knew he had AIDS but kept this deadly secret from her until his body betrayed him. The frightening statistics of HIV/AIDS infections in this country only prove that there are too many secrets in too many relationships—and many of them are harbored by families living in fear, ignorance, and denial. With the statistics raging even higher for African American women, LaJoyce boldly shares her truth after years of silence. Standing on her incredible faith, then as now, LaJoyce says it’s time to stop lying, start telling the truth, and begin to live life with the understanding that only the truth will make you free.
LaJoyce Brookshire has certainly been through the fire, but thanks to her unrelenting faith, came out unscathed.
Here are excerpts from her interview....................
Who are the people most at risk, black women, married?
Black women are highly at risk, yes . And heterosexual women of all walks of life are highly at risk.
How did you maintain your Christian faith when you knew that this man knowingly had AIDS and still slept with you?You know what it is, honestly...because I didn't know that I was being deceived until he was almost dead. It was easier for me to maintain my Christian faith, because I was staying true to my wedding vows. And I thought back to the day of my wedding, when the only tear I shed was when I said, "through sickness and in health". That was the only tear. And we ironically got married on World AIDS Day in 1990- December 1st. That's how I was I able to hold on and just through the grace of God honestly.
Do you recommend that people in marriage get HIV tests?
Absolutely, I think now, its become routine. HIV can slip up on you and you might not ever know. I think what health systems should do is make blood testing mandatory to obtain a marriage license again. When I got married in 1990, to this guy, it was mandatory in 28 states, and now its only mandatory in 14. In the life and times of which we live now, why are there less? It is the responsibility of each individual to gather information; before you swap spit, swap information. No test, no touch! But we say that in theory and it's all fine and good, but here I am in this situation when Mr. Tall, Fine, and Handsome came stumping up in my life sending roses to my job every week, and my nose was open like a Mack truck. There's nothing you can tell a woman when she's in love.
Has there been any backlash?
From his family, yes, his sisters. Outside of that, no. There's been backlash from people, who feel that I preach abstinence... well I do. I don't think that you can put your faith in a condom. You can't put your total and complete faith in a condom. I ask this...If you know the person has AIDS, do you still trust the condom? The answer is generally no! Why then, do you trust it and you're not really sure? You're rolling the dice.
Has there been any backlash?
From his family, yes, his sisters. Outside of that, no. There's been backlash from people, who feel that I preach abstinence... well I do. I don't think that you can put your faith in a condom. You can't put your total and complete faith in a condom. I ask this...If you know the person has AIDS, do you still trust the condom? The answer is generally no! Why then, do you trust it and you're not really sure? You're rolling the dice.
So abstinence outside of marriage?
Abstinence outside of marriage... or until you find out enough information. We don't want to hear that... because it's very hard to hear.
Learn more: HIV/AIDS Education
